My Extended Experience

        In his book, Outside Lies Magic, John Stilgoe writes "Outside lies utterly ordinary space open to any casual explorer willing to find the extraordinary. Outside lies unprogrammed awareness that at times becomes directed serendipity. Outside lies magic." Inspired by this quote, I decided to participate in the paddling excursion for my extended experience, and I focused on truly exploring and looking for the extraordinary within the ordinary space. 

            This trip began with us meeting in the rec center, and then loading up into a van with the kayaks and canoes in toe. The first thing I noticed is how much infrastructure and organization the rec center has put in place for these types of outdoor excursions. I have previously seen the emails about excursions through the rec center, but honestly, I had always ignored them and figured it was people meeting at the location with their own personal supplies and tools. Now that I have seen what these experiences look like firsthand, I am disappointed that I did not take advantage of these opportunities sooner, as the rec center seems to put on great outdoor experiences that allows students to get off campus and enjoy the serene areas in Fort Worth. In fact, after telling my roommates about my experience, we are planning on all signing up for a trip together before we graduate!

            After signing the waivers, we loaded up into the van and headed to Benbrook Lake. On the drive, I found myself looking around and admiring all of the grassland and hills that are around Fort Worth. I have to admit that I often stay in my TCU bubble, rarely going outside a 15-minute radius of campus, so this area was completely new and unseen for me. As I was reflecting on these new sites, I became disappointed in myself as I realized that I have not taken advantage of all the nature experiences Fort Worth has to offer. I give myself the excuse that I am too busy and do not have time to do things like that, but having this scheduled trip showed me that I do have time for it, I just need to put in effort to plan and organize it into my schedule. As I have discussed previously, I am originally from the land of 10,000 lakes, so I grew up around lakes and being on the water is what I would describe as my “happy place.” Because of this, in my last year here at TCU I am setting the goal to put in effort to do one new outdoor activity each month. Currently, some ideas I have are paddle boarding, renting a boat, and hiking on the paths in the Fort Worth Nature Center.

I also do have to note that on this drive, I learned that Texas lakes have water snakes in them, which absolutely terrified me as I have a major fear of snakes. We do not have snakes in the water in Minnesota! One of the guides put my mind at ease slightly when she told me that she has never seen a snake on the excursions and that they typically are in wooded areas by the shore, and I was relieved that there were no snake sightings in our time on the lake. Clearly, I am different from Abbey as I could not have a snake living freely in my home or in my clothes (I got goosebumps even reading that part in the text).

            After a short twenty to thirty minutes filled with great conversations and nature music, special shoutout to the Edward Abbey song that seemed historically accurate to what we learned in class, we arrived at Benbrook Lake. We then unloaded the canoes and brought them down to the water. I applied bug spray all over my body, as I also have a fear of bugs and feel that I am constantly being bitten no matter what I do, so I wanted to make sure I took all the precautions possible. As I was doing so, I could not help but think about what Abbey and other environmentalists would think about bug spray, as it is technically interfering with nature that was in the location before us. These types of thoughts are one key thing that this course has opened my mind too, as I would have never previously thought about bug sprays impact on nature.

            Once we got in the canoe, it took Abby and I some time to get the hand of paddling. It was at this point that I realized I had never canoed before, so it definitely took some time for me to learn how to do it. But I do have to say that I got the hang of it and even became a very skilled turner in doing the backwards paddle. Right when we got on the water, I was stunned by the fact that we were the only ones on the water, as I am used to busy lakes and have never seen one this still. It was absolutely beautiful. I also found the view incredible simply in how large the space felt, as it seemed like the lake went on endlessly like the ocean, yet it was filled with completely still and motionless water. I truly have never seen anything like that, and it made my experience extraordinary since I was appreciating the simple, everyday view of a lake in a completely new way.

Picture 1: First couple minutes on the lake

Picture 2: Beginning of the sunset

            After paddling for some time, the sun began to set, painting the sky with a yellow/orange ombre effect. I usually would be disappointed with the sun setting behind the tree line, but I even found that beautiful, as the trees provided an added level of beauty to the scene. 

Picture 3: The sunset from my perspective

Picture 4: Close-up of the sunset

        Once the sunlight fully disappeared, the stars briefly began to appear in the sky. It was honestly incredible to see, as I have never had an experience like that where I was watching the sky for so long to actually see stars appear almost one by one. I was particularly grateful that, at this time, I was located right next to the student guide, as he was incredibly knowledgeable about the planets and stars. He showed us Jupiter, Polaris, and other constellations in the sky. Particularly, I found myself reflecting on Polaris. Also known as the North Star, it remains still within the sky while the entire northern sky moves around it and is often described as a way to find home no matter where you are. I knew this previously, but actually seeing the North Star while sitting in the wilderness on this empty lake uniquely put this concept into perspective in an emotional way for me. I know that the rec center also offers the full moon paddles, so I hope to also participate in one of those because, similar to stars, I see them everyday but have never taken the time to simply just observe and reflect on it.

Picture 5: End of the sunset

            Once we had watched the stars for a while, we paddled back to the shore and loaded up the trailer to head home. While we were loading up, the park ranger told us we only had 10 minutes before we had to be out, so we had perfect timing in getting off. On the drive back, I realized that this experience had been therapeutic for me. I went into the evening stressed about the busy weekend and week I had coming up but being in these outdoors completely eased my anxiety. I was not stressed about all I had coming up, but instead genuinely enjoyed and lived in the moment. It seemed to have cleared my head, and it honestly put me in the best headspace for the rest of the week. As Emily Dickenson wrote and we discussed in class, nature can often be a religious experience for people, and that is what I had this evening as I was admiring all of God’s creations.

            I honestly believe that I experienced the outdoor magic that Stillgoe describes in his book, and I left this experience with both a newfound appreciation for nature and motivation to put in deliberate effort to have more extended experiences with nature going forward. In reflecting on this experience, I found myself thinking about Walt Whitman’s piece “Miracles,” in which he wrote: “To me every hour of the light and dark is a miracle, every cubic inch of space is a miracle, every square yard of the surface of the earth is spread with the same, every foot of the interior swarms with the same.” Admittedly, I still struggle with fully immersing myself in nature, as I do not like getting dirty or being around bugs and reptiles. However, I do feel like this experience helped me to make significant strides in appreciating the miracle of nature that surrounds me on an everyday basis.

Picture 6: Eagle-eye perspective from my canoe